Answer: There is no one conclusion that covers a whole generation. Researchers are still exploring the long-term impact of the COVID pandemic on children’s development. There is no one “covid effect” that applies to every family. For some children, there will be no negative effect on their Attachment.  

If a family was able to be there for the baby, juggling work and parenting from home, or sharing care in a pod of connected households, that child’s attachment needs were met. If a family was isolated without adequate support, there is the risk that that baby’s attachment needs were not met. For the very young child born during COVID the impact is not direct but is felt through the support, or lack of support, for the parent of the baby and their individual ability to be physically and emotionally available to their young child.  

Answer: Unless it says otherwise, assessments and quizzes online tend to be written for people who are neurotypical. Therefore, the quiz itself is not likely to be very accurate for your son. However, all people have attachment systems. Research on the impact of autism on attachment found that 47% of children diagnosed with autism have a secure attachment to their parent.¹ Which is to say that they seek out their parent for safety and as a secure base for exploration.  Their behavior might look different, but the attachment is similar.  

I have an adult friend with autism. While he seeks out his mother or close friends, he does not request a hug or make eye contact, because those don’t feel good to him. The specifics of his interactions are changed due to his autism, but he does reach out in times of stress. In considering the emotions and behaviors of someone, it can be a challenge to step back and consider what is autism, what is attachment insecurity, and what may be due to other factors. So, while the quiz may not be very helpful, you can consider how to support your son’s attachment security through clear communication and ideas on how he can reach out to others in ways that work for him.  

Answer: I would like to offer a reframe in response to this question. “Parenting” implies an adult to child relationship in which one person is responsible for, and in charge, of the other person. Work to build a healthy relationship with your adult child that respects that they are on their own journey, forever connected to yours but still their own.  

In this different phase of your relationship, you support their attachment style in the same way that you would support other adults. You heal yourself, share as much about your new insights as they are interested in hearing, and communicate clearly. This is an ongoing process as you find ways to discuss expectations, needs, and boundaries throughout both of your journeys.