This is the final in a series, first published in 2021, in which I explore how to move forward when our journey is difficult. The series began with an introduction and has covered six TRUDGE practices for long-term resilience: Tell the Truth , Remember, Unpack Your History, Decide: Fear or Excitement, Go One Step at a Time, and Energize Yourself for the Long Run.

TRUDGE – being resilient as you move through a challenging time in your life.  

This post wraps up our series on TRUDGE, ways to maintain your resilience and ability to keep moving forward when times are difficult. This is exhausting, difficult work. Some days your exhaustion, anger, or despair will feel like more than you can bear. Why keep going? Not because you “should”: Should is a shaming and de-motivating word that implies judgement from others. Keep going for reasons that make sense to you. Some possibilities:  

“Dangit! I am not going to let this stop me. This sucks and I am going to get through it.” You read, talk to people, ask for advice, make decisions for yourself and take steps forward because you do. 

“I don’t want to live like this day in and day out. I want my life to work for me. I need to feel better.” You do. You deserve to live a life that works for you, doing the things you like, seeing the people you love. You deserve to feel better. 

It is amazing to look back at what you have been through and say, “I DID IT!” Learning new things is empowering and you come to understand how to get stuff done when life is doing it’s worst. It feels fabulous to wake up one day and realize “that was then, this is now” and feel free to move forward.  

Right now, I know a few people who are going through some stuff. They are amazingly knowledgeable, kind, and creative. (They are also occasionally snarky and can be hysterically funny.) Like them, you have much to offer and will have more energy to make a difference once your life is easier. Plus you will have all the skills and knowledge you have gained in your own journey.  

One caveat – 

Don’t keep trudging just because you can, or others think you should. There are situations where it makes sense to step away or end the situation. An abusive relationship, an impossible job, a project you no longer care about. “No.” is a complete sentence. 

That being said… Why TRUDGE?

You are worth it.

You may be in the midst of trudging, with obstacles thrown on top of obstacles. You’ve had to make hard decisions with inadequate information. One step at a time, you keep moving forward. As you near the end of your journey, your energy will lift, even though you may not notice at first. You start to smile more often and engage more freely with the world. I wish this for all of us. 

It would be lovely if we didn’t need to know how to trudge. And yet, life happens to all of us. I appreciate that all of you reading these blogs are interested in gaining and sharing resilience. Those of you I know personally are doing amazing things strengthening yourself, caring about others and making a difference in ways that are uniquely you. I look forward to connecting with those of you I don’t know yet – through the Facebook page, on LinkedIn, in a class or through coaching.  

Feel free to revisit the trudge series online. The blog page is searchable so that if you ever want to find one, type a title or subject into the search bar. Laura also does Resilience Coaching if you feel that would be helpful. You can find that information here. If there is a topic or question you have, you can send me an email and I will do my best to respond; I may even write a blog about the topic.  

Peace,

Laura A. Gaines

Explore learnmodelteach.com to learn about our course, Shrinking Anxiety to Grow Resilience.