Resilience and Good Things
November 29, 2023
Public Service Announcement for Winter
December 13, 2023
The holiday season is underway. Winter holidays began long before written history. Their central themes are constant. Finding light in darkness. Gathering with others for storytelling and encouragement. Sharing resources through meals and gifts. These are still primal needs. Different religions and cultures acknowledge these needs in different ways, and yet the core themes are there.
Holiday Stress
Meanwhile each of us carry stress. Grief from the loss of a loved one. An expectation of holiday perfection. Financial struggles. Time crunch. Loneliness. The sense that everyone else has it all together and we alone are struggling can be soul crushing. The reality is that everyone struggles, and we all go through rough times. In this time of year, when the days are short and nights are long, you can make a difference for yourself and others.
You can highlight or change your own traditions to best meet your needs. You can notice opportunities in your day-to-day life to build resilience for yourself and your community. Here are some ideas:
Finding Light in Darkness
Notice when you feel lighter, less worried, or more energized and carefree. Pay attention to the things, large and small, that lift your mood. Look for “glimmers” – the opposite of a trigger a glimmer is a moment that results in you feeling joy, happiness, a sudden lift in mood. Notice these moments of joy. Once aware of them you can build more glimmer moments into your life and share them with others.
When do people react with smiles and gratitude for something you have done? I saw a solemn toddler in a stroller yesterday, her adults busy unloading the car. I smiled and waved at her. She looked puzzled so I smiled again with a little wave. She lit up in a gorgeous smile and waved at me. No one else saw this exchange but it brightened my day, and hopefully hers. May you find many moments of light and enjoy reflecting that light back into other’s lives.
Gathering for Storytelling and Encouragement
Storytelling allows you to make meaning in your life. Listening to others and being listened to is the heart of relationships. As you share your stories you discover you are not alone. Sadness, memories, encouragement, and laughter all mixed together build relationships.
Gathering can be intentional with invitations at a scheduled time and place. It can also be spontaneous. A conversation while waiting in line or wherever you may find yourself can also bring a sense of shared perspective. A brief hello with another woman at a pool led to an hour-long conversation about the joys and worries of being the mother of adult children. We shared deeply about our lives. It was reassuring to know that I am not the only one struggling to know the best way to be supportive. May you be heard and have opportunities to explore your own journey in another’s story.
Sharing Resources Through Meals and Gifts
“Sharing is caring” said my preschool nephew as he eyed my snack. LOL! A lesson learned at school came in handy for him during a family gathering. He was right and it was my pleasure to fix him up with his own plate of goodies. Gift giving can be fraught with stress over the right gift, the fair amount, the coveted item. I have come to see gift giving as an opportunity to delight someone else. I know I won’t always get it right.
Whether it is a formal gift or a chance to give someone an item they need that you have too many of, giving can be very satisfying. Allowing yourself to receive is the necessary other side of the equation. The sharing of what you have with someone who might enjoy or need just that is a delight. Your resource might be time, strength, a tangible object or something you made. Both planned and spontaneous gift giving builds community. May you find delight in giving and receiving this holiday season.
As you journey through this year’s holiday season, in whatever way you celebrate, remember the central themes threaded through all of our traditions and holidays. Light, storytelling, and sharing. These fundamental needs are present in all people. As we each embrace the goodness in our lives and reach out to spread that with our own community, we build resilience in ourselves and others.
Peace,
Laura A. Gaines
To learn more, explore learnmodelteach.com for tools, videos, and coaching opportunities.
