Liminality is a weird word.  

Liminal space is the time between what was and what will be. After a significant change there is a period of uncertainty, confusion, and uneasiness before you find a new normal. Liminal times can have happy endings, but the process is often uncomfortable. No matter how long the liminal time lasts one common feeling is that you don’t know how things will turn out. We are in a liminal space as a country with so much changing at once.

Liminality is more than an expected change or transition. It is when life goes off script and you are unable to go about your day as usual. A micro example is when you move or stay somewhere unfamiliar, and the light switches aren’t where you expect them. You constantly swipe your hand up to be met by a blank wall. You stop, think “what?!” and have to find where the switch is placed. It is no big deal except that the whole day is filled with these micro moments of confusion, adaptation, and getting back on track. By the end of a month, it feels normal for the switches to be where they are. This is an easy example, the emotions in this case are frustration, annoyance, and by the end of the day perhaps mild anger. Note that what ends up changing here are not the light switches but your patterns of behavior. 

Successfully navigating higher levels of liminal change requires support. In the blog Liminality and Graduation, I explore all the changes at this stage of life. Some young adults have a lot of support and get through this stage with relative ease. For those who don’t have support it is a time of intense uncertainty, fear, and risk. In Liminality and Mother’s Day, I shared the story of moving from being my mother’s child to being one of the people that care for my mother. It was, and still is, odd to have our roles flipped yet I have a lot of support from family and friends who have experienced this role change.

A lot of different kinds of support can be helpful during liminal change. Material support can give someone the time and space they need to process the changes. Accurate information allows for improved decision making. Listening ears allow someone to process options as many times as they need to before trying solutions. Emotional support is vital as confusion, overwhelm, exhaustion and so many other strong emotions are normal. While it is uncomfortable to live in the unknown there are options to explore before finding the new normal. 

We are in a liminal time as a country. This is a much bigger scale of change than most of us are used to navigating. In my lifetime the federal government felt like a slow and ponderous beast that made changes gradually. It feels very different now. Headlines announce changes daily, sometimes hourly. Multiple people are directly affected or are worried that they may be affected. Anxiety has skyrocketed. Many people are wishing for things to settle back down.  

The truth is that nothing ever goes back, we can only move forward through liminal times to a new normal. It is very unclear what that will look like. As we live through this weird time in history there is a lot to pay attention to while our personal lives continue to play themselves out. The fact that it is uncomfortable is part of being in a liminal time. My hope is that by writing and talking about it we can get and give support as we move through this uncertain time together. 

Peace,

Laura